June 2nd, 2012
I am saddened that I have to tell you all that my beautiful little kitten passed away today. He was only mine for just over a month but losing him is the hardest thing I have faced here in Swaziland. In a place where you’re always reminded that you’re alone no matter how integrated you become, having a pet was the most comforting thing. He was something to come home to, to snuggle with on these progressively colder winter nights, and he listened to all my venting and still loved me despite it.
I should have listened to my family when they worried about how the dogs and the cats would get along. Last night the dogs, blinded by hunger after not being fed all day, attacked Beau. I heard the fight but couldn’t see what was happening because it was dark out. I couldn’t go near the dogs because when they get aggressive they could easily turn on me. My Bobhuti also heard the commotion and came and chased them off and that’s when I found Beau lying in the dirt. His back had been broken and they had punctured his neck. He was still alive when I got to him but died within minutes. I am glad he didn’t suffer long but feel awful that all I could do was stand and listen to it happen. I keep thinking if I just done something different he would still be here. I am also sad that Bear has lost his brother and his mentor. Beau has helped Bear so much in the last three weeks, I’m fearful of how Bear will progress, without Beau’s guidance.
My host dad took Beau so he could be buried in the morning. He and my host mom feel really bad about it. They said I can get another cat, but I’m not ready for that yet. I can at least find comfort in Bear. We need each other now, more then ever.